‘20 Down. Co-star, with James Drury of the 1962-71 US western series, The Virginian’.

Ooh – it was Doug McClure (didn’t even need to look that up) – my very first crush – he played ‘Trampas’ – anyone else remember him? Of course…ahem, I’m sure they must have been showing episodes of The Virginian well into the seventies (probably even the eighties…), so I’m not really giving away my age here. Ah, he was lovely. So you see, doing the crossword can also take you down Memory Lane, in a very nice way. That’s my excuse, anyway.

Now, a few competition notices for you:

Short Story Competition: Woman’s Own

After all that kerfuffle, Woman’s Own have now agreed (rather grudgingly, one feels…!) to award £200 to the winner of their Summer Special Fiction Competition. Originally, when they weren’t offering any payment, they were asking for ‘stories’ – it suddenly seems to have become ‘story’ – but they have also said (this is all on their Facebook page, just in case you think I have a hotline to the editor!), that if any other stories are considered worthy of being printed in the Summer Special, they will also receive £200. Result!

Here are the details: Your story can be funny, heart-warming, tear jerking or a mystery with a twist in the tale. Stories should be between 1,000-1,300 words, must be original and have not been published elsewhere. Please email entries to wo_specials@ipcmedia.com before 30 April 2012.

What The Dickens..?!

Another free-to-enter short story competition, this time courtesy of Waitrose Weekend magazine, which is offering publication and a Dickens box-set worth £65 to the winner of their competition. (“Are you the modern-day Dickens?”).

There are more details here . Send entries by email to dickenscompetition@waitrose.co.uk closing date: 12th April 2012. Stories must be no more than 1000 words and must demonstrate the ‘poetic style and comic touches Dickens is known for, while providing a social commentary of 2012 Britain.’ Hmm, they don’t want much, then!

Stratford Literary Festival 22nd April – 7th May 2012

The Stratford-upon-Avon Literary Festival programme has just been announced, along with a poetry competition. It’s free-to-enter, but just be aware that, if you’re a winner in one of the 3 age categories or one of the shortlisted poets that they decide to put into their anthology, you won’t get a copy of the book – you’ll have to buy your own! (About £8). I was the adult runner-up in this last year and I never actually managed to get my grubby paws on a copy of the 2011 anthology, so I’ve never seen my poem in there!

The theme is ‘Words Paint Pictures’ and you need the entry form from the website. More details on that – and the programme for the festival – here.

The Rialto Magazine & the RSPB

At the other end of the spectrum, prestigious poetry magazine, The Rialto, is running a ‘Nature’ poetry competition in conjunction with the RSPB. The prizes are good and one of the judges is former Poet Laureate Andrew Motion – he of the golden-syrup voice – but I suspect that, with an entry fee for one poem of £6 (£9 for two) and the fact that it’s in The Rialto, means it’s going to attract the attention of lots of published (very good!) poets! Hmm, call me chicken, but I think I might duck out of this one! But if you want to take a look, the details are here.

Used in that American way, which has now crept into English-English and is very annoying! It needs something after it – ‘enjoy your meal!’ or ‘enjoy yourselves!’ I know I have (very occasionally) used it in this blog but believe me, I was being ironic!

2. Genre

I have to use this word with my classes when we talk about different ‘genres’ (crime, literary, romance, you know the kind of thing). It’s one of those words that are really hard to pronounce. If you say it the French way (because it is, after all, a French word) you sound really pretentious but say it in a really English accent and it sounds naff! (‘GEN-RER’!) Aaah. But there’s no getting around it! What other word can one use?!

3. Tousled

There’s a Herbal Essences advert on TV at the moment, promoting this purple shampoo that makes your hair ‘tousled’ (all kind of messy, if you ask me). I’ve nothing against the product – it’s just that word and how it’s pronounced. (TOW – as in ‘TOWIE’ – sulled) It gives me the heebie-jeebies (like tearing cotton wool!). Is it just me?!

4. Anyway

Since my ‘friend’ pointed out that I use it all the time, I feel really self-conscious when it pops out! (all the time). But I can’t stop saying it…!

5. Slough

No, not the town where The Office was set, but to rhyme with ‘rough’ and as in (like a snake) ‘slough off one’s skin’. Ugh – it’s such a horrible word! It was in a prize-winning (and otherwise very good) love poem that I read with my classes recently and it’s another word that gives me the creeps.

Anyone agree with me – or have you got any other words that you can’t stand….?

Used with permission from Debbie Ridpath Ohi at Inkygirl.com."

I was in a shop today and I overhead one assistant say to another, “Well, Stan, what did you buy your wife for Valentine’s?”
Stan replied,”A snow shovel!” Then he added, “I think she was a bit disappointed……. well, it hasn’t snowed!”

Which just goes to show, what I always say – there are some great lines of dialogue out there, for the taking, if you just keep your ears open!

As for me… well, I’m treating ‘him indoors’ to a curry tonight! But not just any old curry… no! We’re off to Morrisons’ cafe (two curries for £8.50, including a drink each!). No-one can accusing me of not pushing the boat out!

That was Diane Fordham’s number, so she is the winner of the book and I’ll be sending it out to her, (in Australia! Proof, if any were needed, that I did not fix this draw!) just as soon as she emails me her address.

Diane is on a bit of a roll at the moment as she’s had three stories accepted for publication recently – and now this amazing win! (Well, maybe not amazing but it’s nice to win, isn’t it?). I often find life – and writing – goes like that. All the good things often come at once. Just enjoy it, Diane!

Diane blogs at www.dianefordham.blogspot.com – you might want to drop by and have a look.

Thanks to the other 30 people who entered the draw. Just as soon as I win the lottery (£10 would do) or something, I will be running a similar giveaway, so watch this space!

But anyway, I digress. Just a quick reminder, that my little book giveaway finishes tonight at the traditional hour of midnight, so if you haven’t yet left a comment, saying why you want to win (and 30 people have!), then what are you waiting for?! I will be drawing the winner, via the random number generator thing, in the morning.

The Telegraph Short Story Club has announced – and published – its winner for January. They had almost 700 entries from all over the world but what perturbed me most was the line “with the ages of the entrants ranging from 12 to 89.” Eek – I didn’t put my age! Were you supposed to? This is, obviously, why my story wasn’t shortlisted! Note to self: next time do not be bashful and PUT AGE! (actually, am I the only person out there who keeps forgetting how old they are?)

Anyway, I really liked the story they chose (The Man of Science, by Victoria Maxwell). It’s the kind of story I aspire to write. (Must try harder!) It was funny and clever and probably not as ‘literary’ as you might have expected. But then, as judge Louise Doughty says, “Good comic writing is much harder than it looks” and “When you come to read the story don’t be fooled by this story’s lightness of touch.”

I agree. It’s the kind of story that many people will turn their noses up at in a kind of ‘is that it?’ way. If you think you can do better, send your story off for the February competition – and good luck!

All the hairdressers were rushing out to move their cars to a different car park (off the hill) because ‘last time it snowed this much, buses were skidding down the High Street, cars were bouncing up onto the pavements, polar bears were roaming the town…’ OK, maybe not that bit, but you get the picture. They really scared me! I just wanted to buy soup and run home before the blizzard hit. And guess what – ? We haven’t had a flake of flippin’ snow! Pah!

Woman’s Own magazine has caused a bit of a kerfuffle on Facebook today with this little ‘call for submissions’:

Calling all budding authors! Would you like your short story to appear in Woman’s Own? If you love writing fiction, we want to hear from you – and the best entries will appear in print in the Woman’s Own Summer Special! Your story can be funny, heart-warming, tear jerking or a mystery with a twist in the tale. Stories should be between 1,000-1,300 words, must be original and have not been published elsewhere. There is no fee for publication. Please email entries to wo_specials@ipcmedia.com before 30 April 2012.

Sounds OK, doesn’t it? A magazine that stopped printing fiction some time ago, now asking for fiction submissions! Ah, but there’s that little sentence tucked away just before the end of the paragraph: ‘There is no fee for publication’. What they actually mean is: give us your stories for FREE! (Add Woman’s Own to the Naughty List immediately!)

Needless to say, there’s been a bit of an outcry. Go to the Woman’s Own facebook page if you want to see the heated comments or add your own.

But you might be thinking ‘I’d like to have a go – and sod the fact that I won’t be paid!’ and that’s your right, of course. You won’t have much competition from the ‘Womag’ writers, that’s for sure!

On a different note, the Writers Bureau have just launched the latest in their monthly writing competitions (free to enter – hurrah!) and this time they’re looking for ‘flash fiction’ – a 50 word love story, inspired, no doubt, by Valentine’s Day next week. If yours is chosen as the winner, you’ll get a fiction course, so it’s probably worth a go.
For more information see here. The closing date is 29th February.

And one more thing. If you wanted to enter the Good Housekeeping novel writing competition but missed the issue with the entry form in, the kind people at GH have printed one on their website, which you can download on this page here.

Good luck!

Snowy weekend!

I know it’s rather late but I couldn’t let today go by without saying ‘Happy Birthday’ to Charles Dickens, who was born 200 years ago today. Whatever you might think about Charles ‘the man’ (and he wasn’t the nicest of people, especially if you were married to him, by all accounts), there’s no denying he was a consummate storyteller and creator of some wonderful characters (Fagin, the Artful Dodger, Miss Havisham, Pip, Tiny Tim, Oliver… need I go on?!)

If you fancy winning an annual family pass to Dickens World in Kent, ‘The Book People’ are running a little writing competition. Just send them a review (max 150 words) of your favourite Dickens novel. Simples!

Closing date is 5th April, there’s no entry fee and you can email your entry (Subject: Charles Dickens Competition) to: competitions@thebookpeople.co.uk

There’s also a children’s writing competition (open to open to primary and secondary school children in the UK aged 9–14, run by the ‘What The Dickens?’ website. More details here.

And Foyles bookshop is running a competition to win a complete set of Vintage Classic Charles Dickens novels – worth £125. No writing involved in this one – you just have to guess which character Dickens was referring to when he said, “Of all my books, I like this the best. It will be easily believed that I am a fond parent to every child of my fancy, and that no one can ever love that family as dearly as I love them. But, like many fond parents, I have in my heart of hearts a favourite child. And his name is…”

Easy peasy, lemon squeezee! See here to enter!

And finally – a man who could come up with a quote like this can’t be all bad, can he?

“There is nothing better than a friend, unless it is a friend with chocolate.”
― Charles Dickens

(hmm.. and if any of my friends are reading this, dark Bounty does it for me every time!)

Snowdrops are coming up! How 'positive' is that?!

Firstly, thanks to Helen for allowing me to guest post on her blog, and good luck to everyone who has entered her competition. (Fantastic prize, by the way!)

As writers, I think there’s one important lesson we have to learn. Rejection is necessary. Only when you’ve been rejected, can you really appreciate an acceptance. What we need to understand is that rejection is not the end of the journey, but merely a stepping-stone along that journey. Let me give you an example. The Weekly News has just published a short story of mine: A Library Full of Murder. However, that story has been rejected eight times. That’s eight times I could simply have thrown it away, decided it wasn’t publishable, and brought the journey of that piece of writing to an end. But I didn’t. I kept rewriting and sending it out. And I was rewarded with publication … last week. Yippee!

There is an interesting adjunct to this tale. One of those eight publications that had previously rejected my story was a publication called The Weekly News! Originally, I’d submitted it to the fiction editor, Billy Wiggins, who was covering the role whist Jill Finlay was on maternity leave. Billy rejected it. But I decided to try it again with the current fiction editor, Jill Finlay, who liked it and accepted it. Proof, if ever any were needed, how subjective these decisions can be.

Ten other publishers rejected The Positively Productive Writer, before Compass Books decided they liked it. That’s ten times when I could have given up. But I didn’t.

Having the right frame of mind can help you to put things into perspective and not give up. That’s why I wrote the book, because we can all learn how to turn things around. I’ve been overwhelmed by the reviews that The Positively Productive Writer has already received on Amazon, and I’ve also received many emails from readers who have contacted me directly. One was from an ex-student of mine, who was doing well with his writing, having had numerous articles published, but a few years ago was diagnosed with a health condition. This causes him pain throughout his body, so he doesn’t know how he’s going to feel from one day to the next. With other family health problems to contend with too, his writing took a back seat, and then he began wondering whether he would be able to write anything again.

Then he bought my book and read it. He emailed to say it made him realise that as long as he wrote something everyday, he would be able to finish a piece of writing. Suddenly, he was hopeful again. Ideas were buzzing around in his head once more. Two days later, he emailed again. He’d decided to pitch an article idea to one of the editors he used to do a lot of work for. Twenty-four hours later, the editor replied, commissioning the piece, and also saying how good it was hear from him again. There’s an example of how just having the right frame of mind has led to something positive. I’m not saying positivity guarantees success, but without the positive attitude, my ex-student wouldn’t have taken the action to approach the editor with his idea. It’s that action that resulted in his commission.

As writers, we are blessed with overactive imaginations – it’s what gives us all of those wonderful ideas in the first place! But our imaginations can also work against us, making us think things for which there is no logical evidence. It’s actions that make things happen, but it’s how we’re thinking that determines whether we take any action in the first place. Once you understand how to focus on the positive, your chances of taking action and being productive are that much greater. And a productive writer stands much more chance of being a successful writer.

Good luck!

Read Simon’s blog and more about his new book ‘The Positively Productive Writer’ here

Simon’s a full-time freelance writer, creative writing tutor and all-round jolly nice chap – who knows his stuff – and I was sure this book would be well worth a read – and it is! (I’ve splashed out and bought two – one for you and one for me).

I’ve only read the first chapter and I’m already feeling inspired and motivated and more productive!

So, if you’d like to win a copy, just post a comment on here, saying why you’d like to win – and I’ll put you in the draw, which will take place on Sunday 12th Feb, two weeks today.

The competition is open to anyone but if I’m not able to contact the winner within two weeks of the closing date (and this has happened to me before..!) then I reserve the right to give the book to the next person selected by the ‘random number generator’ (I’ve still got to work out how to do that, by the way, but it can’t be that hard, can it?!).

Good luck!

Short Story Competitions x 3

I mentioned the Telegraph’s ‘Short Story Club’ a few posts back. It now has 1000 members, which, as moderator Louise Doughty says “surely nails the publishing industry’s often-repeated assertion that nobody is interested in short fiction these days.”

The latest of Louise’s columns, which talks about ‘gripping first lines’ and invites you to post yours on the site, is available to read here.

If you want to enter the Club’s first short story competition, you don’t need to ‘join’ – just email your entry (max 2000 words) by 31st Jan to storycomp@telegraph.co.uk

I had a go and sent a story of mine that’s been floating around for a while. It’s been shortlisted and ‘highly commended’ in various competitions but has never won anything. I think lots of us have stories like that. But I like it and I am determined to find it a home somewhere this year!

Talking of competitions, if you entered the Peter Barry estate agent’s short story competition (or even if you didn’t), you might be interested to see the results, which they are drip-feeding, here. They’ve shortlisted 12 (out of 217 entries) and they’re publishing them at a rate of two per day (there are four on the site so far). I’m keeping my fingers crossed that my story is going to appear over the next few days.

The stats for this competition make interesting reading. They disqualified 8 for not following the rules and they had 18 entries in the last hour of the competition – mine was one of those!

Mslexia is running its regular short story competition – details here (closing date is 19th March 2012). There are some great prizes but a hefty entry fee of £10 – so I’d say think carefully and only send in your very best work if you’re going to have a go at this one (plus – you have to be a woman! Sorry guys!). Judge Tessa Hadley says that short stories need to be ‘unexpected’ and ‘surprising’.

And there’s also an article about writing short stories and an exercise on the website which is interesting. I don’t subscribe to Mslexia any more (had to cut back a bit!) but I find the website has almost as much stuff on it as the magazine – and it’s free!

Libraries

And finally, to celebrate National Libraries Day on 4th February, there are lots of events happening in libraries throughout the country and specifically in the West Midlands (read more about it here).

Some are holding coffee mornings, others have got book sales or reader and writer events. As we’re all aware, libraries are under threat these days so try to show your support if you can by going along (you might even enjoy it!)

The library at Lumb Bank (Arvon's centre in Yorkshire. Eee bah gum).

I’ve written about Arvon courses before (here) but as this year’s brochure has just popped through my letter box (*sighs and wishes she could go on them all*) and they’re running another competition to win a place on an Arvon course, I thought I’d give them another mention.

For this year’s competition you have to create your own ‘word artwork’ (so, it could be a poem in fridge magnets or a collage of words from a newspaper, a photo of words in the sand… you get the idea. The more imaginative, the better!).

Then you have to submit a digital image of the artwork to www.arvonfoundation.org/wordartcompetition by 18th May 2012.

Both the writing and the artwork will be judged and entry is free, although they do encourage you to make a donation to support Arvon’s charitable work. There are more details here.

As this is not as straight forward as a ‘simple’ writing competition, I think they’ll have less entries (come on, admit it, you lost interest a little bit when you read ‘you have to submit a digital image…’ ! I know I did). BUT If you thought ‘GREAT!’ and you’re already bursting with ideas, then get moving on it because you’ve got a very good chance of scooping that fabulous prize – worth over £600!

Right, enough procrastinating. Tax return, here I come…!